Amalebula

5/07/2019

Labo Abangafundi Futhi Abangazi Lutho: Abazona Yini Izilwane?






















Iyiphi indlela yokufuna efanele kunazo zonke endleleni yanamuhla? Hlobo luni lomuntu okufanele uzibone uyilo ekufuneni kwakho? Kufanele wazi indlela yokusingatha yonke into ekwehlelayo manje, kungaba izilingo noma ukuhlupheka, ukusola okunonya noma iziqalekiso—kufanele ucabangisise ngakho konke lokhu. Kungani ngisho lokhu? Kungoba ngemva kwakho konke, okukwehlelayo manje kuyisilingo esisodwa sesikhashana esilandela esinye. Mhlawumbe akuyona inkinga enkulu kuwe manje ngakho umane uvumele izinto ziqhubeke, ungakubheki njengomcebo oyigugu wokufuna kwakho intuthuko. Awunaki kakhulu! Empeleni uthatha lo mcebo oyigugu njengamafu antanta phambi kwamehlo akho, futhi awuzibheki njengezibalulekile lezi zikhawu zamagalelo anamandla, ezingabukeki zinzima ngaleyo ndlela kuwe. Umane ubukisise buthule futhi awuzifaki enhliziyweni, kodwa uzibheka njengezide zingqimuza udonga. Uyazidla kakhulu! Uwabukela phansi amagalelo okuhlasela okunamandla okulandela okunye, ngezinye izikhathi uze umomotheke ngasese, ubonise ukungabi nandaba. Lokhu kungenxa yokuthi awukaze ucabange ngokuthi kungani uhlale uhlushwa yilolu hlobo “lweshwa.” Kungenzeka yini ukuthi angibacabangeli abanye abantu? Ingabe ngimane ngikunakile nje? Nakuba ukucabanga kwakho kungekukhulu njengoba ngikuchazile, lobo buntu “obuzothile” buliveze ngokucacile ingaphakathi lenhliziyo yakho. Asikho isidingo sokusho lokhu, okufihleke ekujuleni enhliziyweni yakho akulutho ngaphandle kwamazwi ahlabayo, amabadlana osizi olungapheli okunzima kwabanye ukuba bakubone. Kungenxa yokuthi uhlushwe yilolu hlobo lwezilingo waze waba nomuzwa wokuthi akunabulungiswa kakhulu, ngalokho ujikijela amazwi ahlaba ngale ndlela. Unomuzwa wokuthi umhlaba awuthokomele ngenxa yalezi zilingo, ngenxa yalokho ugcwele usizi. Awuwaboni amagalelo alandelanayo nokuqondiswa okulandelanayo njengesivikelo esingcono, kodwa ukubheka njengezinto ezingenangqondo ezichukuluzayo ezivela eZulwini noma isijeziso esikufanele. Awazi lutho! Uvalele ngonya izikhathi ezinhle kakhulu ebumnyameni, futhi ubona izikhathi ezilandelanayo zezivivinyo ezinhle nokuqondiswa njengokuhlaselwa yisitha. Awukwazi ukuvumelana nezimo zendawo, ngaphezu kwalokho, awuzimisele ukuvumela isimo. Lokhu kungenxa yokuthi awuzimisele ukuzuza lutho ekusoleni okuza kulandelana okubheka njengokunonya. Awufuni noma ucingisise, futhi uziyekele entandweni yeZulu—nomaphi lapho uphelela khona kulapho ukhona. Ukusola okubona kulunya akukaze nhlobo kuyiguqule inhlizyo yakho, futhi akukaze kube senhliziyweni yakho. Kunalokho, kumane kwayilimaza. Lokhu “kusola okunonya” ukubheke njengesitha kuphela kulokhu kuphila kodwa awuzuzanga lutho. Uzidla kakhulu! Awukholwa nakancane ukuthi uqondwe yilezi zilingo ngenxa yokuthi wenyanyeka kakhulu, kunalokho, ukholwa ukuthi unamabhadi kakhulu, uhlale uthi ngikucubungula ngokwedlulele. Kuze kube manje, kungakanani ukuqonda empeleni onakho ngalokho engikushoyo nengikwenzayo? Ungacabangi ukuthi uzalwe uhlakaniphile, ucishe nje ube sezulwini futhi wengame umhlaba. Awuhlakaniphile kunabanye abantu, futhi kungashiwo ukuthi uyisiphukuphuku kakhudlwana kunabanye abantu abanomqondo emhlabeni ngoba uzibona uphakeme ngokwedlulele; awukaze ube nomuzwa wobuncane. Kubonakala sengathi uzibona ngokucacile zonke izinto engizenzayo. Iqiniso liwukuthi awuyena umuntu ohluzekile. Lokhu kungenxa yokuthi awunalo ulwazi ngalokhu engizokwenza, futhi wazi okuncane ngalokho engikwenza manje. Yingakho ngithi ngeke uqhathaniswe nomlimi omnkantsha ubomvu ongakuqondi ukuphila komuntu kodwa othembele ezibusisweni ezivela eZulwini ukuze alime. Awukubheki njengokubalulekile ukuphila kwakho futhi awazi nangedumela, futhi kuncane okwaziyo ngawe. “Unamandla futhi uphakeme” ngokwedlulele! Ngikhathazekile ngokuthi amasoka noma izintombi ezinhle njengani zizokwazi kanjani ukumelana nokuhlasela kwezivunguvungu namagagasi amakhulu ngokwengeziwe? Lawo masoka azithandela ukudlala awanandaba nohlobo lwendawo akuyo njengamanje. Kubonakala kuyindaba encane—abanandaba nalezi zinto. Abanombono ophambene futhi abazibheki njengabaphansi. Kunalokho, bahambe bezululeka futhi bechiphatheka “ezindaweni” beziphephetha. Laba “bantu” abangafundi futhi abangazi lutho, abazi nakwazi ukuthi kungani ngisho lezi zinto kubo. Bazazi kancane ngeso elibi, futhi ngemva kwalokho izindlela zabo ezimbi aziguquki. Ngemva kokusuka Kimi bayaqhubeka bedunguza ezweni beziqhenya futhi bekhohlisa. Ukubukeka kobuso bakho kuguqula ngokushesha okukhulu—usangikhohlisa ngale ndlela. Unesibindi esikhulu! Futhi lezo zintombi ezinhle ngempela ziyahlekisa. Zizwa amazwi Ami aphuthumayo, zibona indawo ezikuyo, bese zihluleka ukuzibamba zikhale izinyembezi; zisonta imizimba yazo njengokungathi zizama ukuyenga. Kuyenyanyisa kakhulu! Owesifazane ubona isiqu sakhe alale embhedeni futhi ahlale khona, akhale into engapheli, njengokungathi useyacinana. Kula mazwi ubona ukungavuthwa nokuba phansi kwakhe, ngemva kwalokho agcwale imibono engemihle. Uyagqolozela angacwayizi, futhi akukho ukukhanya emehlweni akhe; akakhonondi, futhi akangizondi—unombono ophambene ngezinga lokuthi akanyakazi. Akafundi futhi akazi lutho. Ngemva kokusuka Kimi uphinde ancokole futhi adlale, futhi lolo “hleko olunjengezinsimbi zesiliva” lufana nje “nenkosazana yensimbi yesiliva.” Kokubili kubuthaka ngokwedlulele futhi kuntula ngokwedlulele ekuzidabukeleni! Nonke, eniyizimpahla ezilimele phakathi kwesintu—nintula kakhulu ebuntwini! Anikwazi ukuzithanda noma ukuzivikela, anisiqondi isizathu, aniyifuni indlela yangempela noma nithande ukukhanya kwangempela, futhi ikakhulu anikwazi ukuzibheka njengabayigugu. Niqhubeke isikhathi eside nichilizela ngemuva kwezingqondo zenu amazwi emfundiso Yami futhi nize nawasebenzisela ukuzithokozisa ngesikhathi senu sokuphumula. Benilokhu niwasebenzisa “njengesongo lenhlanhla.” Lapho uSathane ekumangalela, uvele uthandaze kancane. Lapho unombono ophambene, uyalala, futhi lapho ujabule ugijima sengathi uyahlanya. Lapho ngikuthethisa, unqekuzisa ikhanda ukhothame, kodwa lapho ungishiya uhleka uze ubhuquze phansi. Phakathi kwabantu uhlale ungophakeme futhi awukaze uzicabange kunguwena oqhosha kakhulu. Uhlale uphakeme futhi unamandla, uzidla kakhulu futhi unenkani exakile. Uhlobo olunjalo “lomfana,” “lwentombazane,” “lwensizwa,” “lwentombi,” olungafuni noma olungazi lutho lungawaphatha kanjani amazwi Ami njengomcebo oyigugu? Ngizophinde ngikubuze—ufundeni emazwini Ami nasemsebenzini Wami kuso sonke lesi sikhathi? Amacebo enu awukuhlakanipha? Inyama yenu iyinkimbinkimbi kakhulu? Ningibheka njengongelutho? Ngizonitshela ngingafihli, lo msebenzi Wami omkhulu manje usuwenze isibindi senu, esasingangesegundane, saba sikhulu. Ukungesaba kwenu kuncipha ngosuku ngoba nginomusa omkhulu. Angikaze ngisebenzise izindlela ezinodlame ukuze ngijezise inyama yenu. Mhlawumbe ngendlela enikubona ngayo, ngimane ngikhuluma ngokhahlo, kodwa izikhathi eziningi ngiyamomotheka kini futhi kukancane nginigxeka bukhoma. Futhi kubaluleke nakakhulu ngoba ngihlale ngicabanga ngamaphutha enu ukuthi anenze nangiphatha ngendlela inyoka ephatha ngayo umlimi onomusa. Ngilazisa ngempela ikhono lesintu lokulinganisa ngokucophelela abanye—liyamangalisa ngempela, lihle kakhulu! Ngizokutshela iqiniso. Ukuthi unenhliziyo ehloniphayo noma cha, namuhla akubalulekile. Angithukile noma ngikhathazeke, kodwa ngizokutshela nokuthi wena “sihlakaniphi” esingafundi nesingazi lutho ekugcineni uzoqothulwa kukho kanye ukuhlakanipha kwakho nokuzibona uhlakaniphile. Kuzoba nguwe ohluphekayo, futhi kuzoba nguwe osolwayo. Ngeke ngibe yisiphukuphuku ngaleyo ndlela ukuba ngingaqhubeka ngikuphelezela uye esihogweni futhi uqhubeke uhlupheka, ngoba mina nawe asilona uhlobo olufanayo. Ungakhohlwa ukuthi uyindalo engayiqalekisa, eyafundiswa futhi yasindiswa Yimi. Ayikho into engiyilangazelelayo. Akunandaba ukuthi ngisebenza nini, akekho umuntu, izehlakalo, noma izinto okungangikhohlisa. Kungashiwo ukuthi isimo somqondo Wami nendlela engibheka ngayo isintu bekulokhu kufana. Awukho umusa enginawo kini ngoba niyisengezo ekuphatheni Kwami; nakanjani awunawo amandla amakhulu okudlula enye into. Ngiyakweluleka ukuthi uhlale ukhumbula ukuthi uyindalo nje kuphela! Nakuba uhlala Nami, kufanele uyazi indawo yakho ungaziboni uphakeme kakhulu. Ngisho noma ngingakugxeki noma ngibhekane nawe, ngiyamomotheka kuwe, lokhu akufakazeli ukuthi Mina nawe siwuhlobo olufanayo. Kufanele wazi ukuthi ufuna iqiniso, wena ngokwakho awulona iqiniso! Kufanele uguquke ngokuvumelana namazwi Ami nganoma isiphi isikhathi—ngeke ukubalekele lokhu. Ngikweluleka ukuba ufunde okuthile ngesikhathi usekulezi zikhathi ezimangalisayo, lapho lisekhona leli thuba eliyivelakancane, ungazami ukungikhohlisa. Akudingeki ukuba ungiphambe ngokuncoma. Ukungifuna kwakho akungenxa Yami nhlobo—kungenxa yakho!

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